Prime Minister Jacinda Ardern says she still feels there are "moulds" that politicians are expected to fit into, including herself, but says she's trying to be Prime Minister "my way".
Ardern spoke with former All Black and mental health advocate Sir John Kirwan as part of his Mentemia series Heads up, saying she understands well that certain professions are subject to certain expectations.
The Prime Minister said she does feel the pressure to be and act a certain way, but that she has tried to be her own person.
"For me, it started really from the moment I was a politician - the same expectations around what politicians are meant to be like extend into being Prime Minister, I think," Ardern said.
One particular occasion when she decided to not follow those expectations was when she was asked by a media outlet to be interviewed following a political stoush.
"We'd had a brutal situation in the news, and they wanted me to criticise the minister," she said.
"And I said to them, actually what's happened here is not the minister's fault, so I'm not going to criticise the minister, but here are the things that I will say.
"And they said no, we're not interested in you saying anything other than just criticising.
"In my mind, actually, it wasn't worth it - so I said no, I didn't do the interview and that for me I think was really a turning point for me saying I am going to do this my way - and if it means that I don't succeed, oh well.
"So by the time I came in as Prime Minister, I think I'd already just decided that was the way I would operate."
The expectation that a leader shouldn't show too much emotion was a current stereotype, Ardern said, but despite thinking leaders should express themselves their way, she admitted she still felt pressure to be stoic.
"I still catch myself if I find myself getting a bit choked up - I will try and hide that," Ardern said.
She admitted that "obviously last week I didn't do a good job" - referring to her shedding a tear during her visit to Whakatāne's Mataatua Marae to attend the commemoration service for the Whaakari/White Island eruption.
"I still, in the back of my mind, have this idea that that's not what people need to see from their leaders.
Ardern said some of the significant mental health issues across various New Zealand sectors could probably be attributed to people trying to act a certain way based on perceived expectations.
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